Define Infinity wrote:
noodles wrote:
nime is in that most beautiful of dilemmas: calming the storm would not only increase his chances of success, but also make failure much more tolerable, and yet calming a storm is impossible
or perhaps i am feeling poetic because i see girls that remind me of "her" - the curve of their hips, the pattern of their dress, or the mop of hair atop their short, straight, relaxed posture - and my heart skips a beat.
: - (
eye contact. i look down, smiling with the shame of a man who cannot get over something that never was, who cannot leave a place that never existed. she smiles back. the twinkle of sunlight in her eye and the curve of her lips remind me even more of...
i should not say it! ...but i can't help but think it
Oh God. It's really absurd how much I miss her and how much I want to be with her. From this morning I'm trying to think less about her and getting myself ready for rejection. On the other hand, I don't want to give up hope. There are strong evidence that she is genuinely interested in me and also evidence that she seems to be uncertain, unsure and potentially scared of being hurt. Maybe she is just hiding her emotions just beacause she doesn't know me that well. Girls are notorious for hiding their feelings much better than guys. But maybe that's just the hope I'm giving myself. It's so hard to know what I should be doing. So hard to resist the urgue to text her. She was supposed to texted me this afternoon but she never did and I did have a strong feeling that she wouldn't. I am not texting her and I will see if she in fact does text and say something like I couldn't text sorry, or something, which I will find hard to believe in the first place. Fucking life! I am going on a date with her on Saturday. I wish I knew what I could say to solve this heartache.
The storm is indeed immense. Immense indeed!
ok. check this out. i have given you my advice. (dont text her btw) but you need to do what ever your heart is telling you to do. if you do whatever you think is right you will not have any regrets no matter how it turns out. if you take my advice noodles advice or trapts advice and shit doesnt work out you may resent us or resent yourself for not doing what you thought you should do.
there is no right answer.
opinions are like assholes, everybody has one. advice is the same way man. what im trying to say is this: if you follow your heart (goddamn that sounds gay) you cant really make a mistake. because you did what you thought was right. idk if im making sense.
anyway i hope you understand what im trying to say. i still stand by my advice but fact is you have to do what you have to do. know what i mean??
Yeah... I do. The gut feeling is sometimes the best feeling and the strongest and the most precise feelings one has. In this case, I don't think I'll be able to get through the date if we are talking totally off subject. I will redirect the coversation somehow. First in an indirect way and then subtly make it direct. At this point, I have nothing to lose. She either has genuine interest in me or she doesn't. It's as simple as that. There is no two ways about. She either wants to take this friendship further than that's just meaningful hugs or she wants to leave it at that. Having said that, I will be very calm and contain myself during this conversation because that's only right way to do it. It's been about two weeks since I asked her be my girlfriend and she said no and wanted to know me better. But I can sense things, too. This slowly progressive shit might work when there isn't strong feelings. But when's strong feelings at stake then it becomes a totally different situation. I mean it's been almost four weeks now.
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