Metal Reviews

Well, you show a bit of distance and let her pursue you more. Let her worry that you might be unsure and give her the chance to decide. It seems weird and I don't like games, but she can't know how she feels about you until she is faced with the moment that she might not take up possibilities with you, if you know what I mean.

Yeah I think I know what you mean. You think it's a good idea on the lunch date that we have on Saturday to talk more about where this going, maybe give her a chance to speak and see what she has to say. I have this thought that she doesn't want to take the CHANCE to tell me how she really feels. I do want to pick this discussion with her some way. Most likely in an indirect way but maybe I can make it that direct in some way. I don't know. Dude, my feeling for her have grown to be VERY strong. Don't you give me the right to know how she feels and how much I can be sure that she also mutually feels what I feel? I mean, I feel insecure. It is problematic that she doesn't express herself.

I wouldn't push her to express herself, because you might push her into saying no altogether. Giving her space will open up the gap that will lead her to coming to you with her decision, if she truly wants to go forward with you. My two cents, at least.

Entirely agreed with trapt.

Yeah man all will be fine. Just get tired of the fight sometimes. I'm good though. I can fix this shit.

Thanks guys.

I also agree with trapt.

Yeah... alright. I just have this feeling that's in it's not going to be positive. But I could be totally wrong. In any case, I suppose you have to lose a part of your self to be able to gain something. Anticipation is killing me and if she still isn't expressing herself then that will say something about this friendship and that's that she does not want to be a couple. That's makes me incredibly melancholy.

Girls are different than us with their emotions and shit. For the most part guys know what they want. Girls not so much. If I was in your situation I would try to stuff my feelings somewhere and just wait for her. It's not easy. But if you rush her you may find that you lose her as a friend as well as losing her as a love interest. Girls get scared if a guy comes on too strong. Idk why but they do.

I really don't know what to tell you about how to go forward with this. And I apologize if what I said was harsh in any way. But I think at this point a little distance no matter how hard it is for you may be good. Cause she needs to figure out how she feels and not having you around as much might make her realize that she does have feelings for you.

Idk I could be way wrong but from your posts and how you describe how she is acting it sounds like she doesn't have the same feelings. And if she does she doesn't know it yet. I hope I'm wrong because I know you really care for her and you seem like a great guy and I don't want to see you get hurt.

My best bet right now is to conceal my feelings. Distance and, yes, give her a chance to think about her feelings. It's really hard to say because she gives me all sorts of signals, hence, being uncertain. At this point, there's nothing I can do about it but just to wait and see what she has to say. She's had a difficult past with divorce (from her mother) and hurt relationships (as far as her self). So that's where she comes from and most highly probable why she is reserved in her feelings and does not want to take a chance (yet). In any case that might hold true... My job is to wait and suffer and also persevere until she shows her true self to me, being good or bad.

Yep. I think so. Remember thy most girls despite whatever they may have went thru always say one thing and mean another. What I mean is this:

I've had girls tell me how much they want a sensitive guy who cares about how they feel. I am that guy. Then they decide to date the biggest assholes. And I'm left thinking wtf just happened. Years of this has turned me into a asshole. Now if a girl says she wants a sensitive guy i will laugh at her and be an asshole. I get much further this way. Most of what I just said might not apply to you or your situation but the rule still applies most times. If a girl says she wants "a" most likely she really wants "b".

This. Girls are in a precarious position insofar as when guys court them, they need to be given a chance to exert some autonomy and come to the conclusion on their own.

Guys I immensely appreciate your genuine input. It means so much to me. Thank you. I obviously have physical friends that I talk about this with them but having you guys comment on it since we know each other is very very good.

Anytime man.

nime is in that most beautiful of dilemmas: calming the storm would not only increase his chances of success, but also make failure much more tolerable, and yet calming a storm is impossible

or perhaps i am feeling poetic because i see girls that remind me of "her" - the curve of their hips, the pattern of their dress, or the mop of hair atop their short, straight, relaxed posture - and my heart skips a beat.

: - (

eye contact. i look down, smiling with the shame of a man who cannot get over something that never was, who cannot leave a place that never existed. she smiles back. the twinkle of sunlight in her eye and the curve of her lips remind me even more of...

i should not say it! ...but i can't help but think it

Oh God. It's really absurd how much I miss her and how much I want to be with her. From this morning I'm trying to think less about her and getting myself ready for rejection. On the other hand, I don't want to give up hope. There are strong evidence that she is genuinely interested in me and also evidence that she seems to be uncertain, unsure and potentially scared of being hurt. Maybe she is just hiding her emotions just beacause she doesn't know me that well. Girls are notorious for hiding their feelings much better than guys. But maybe that's just the hope I'm giving myself. It's so hard to know what I should be doing. So hard to resist the urgue to text her. She was supposed to texted me this afternoon but she never did and I did have a strong feeling that she wouldn't. I am not texting her and I will see if she in fact does text and say something like I couldn't text sorry, or something, which I will find hard to believe in the first place. Fucking life! I am going on a date with her on Saturday. I wish I knew what I could say to solve this heartache.

The storm is indeed immense. Immense indeed!

ok. check this out. i have given you my advice. (dont text her btw) but you need to do what ever your heart is telling you to do. if you do whatever you think is right you will not have any regrets no matter how it turns out. if you take my advice noodles advice or trapts advice and shit doesnt work out you may resent us or resent yourself for not doing what you thought you should do.

there is no right answer.

opinions are like assholes, everybody has one. advice is the same way man. what im trying to say is this: if you follow your heart (goddamn that sounds gay) you cant really make a mistake. because you did what you thought was right. idk if im making sense.

anyway i hope you understand what im trying to say. i still stand by my advice but fact is you have to do what you have to do. know what i mean??

Yeah... I do. The gut feeling is sometimes the best feeling and the strongest and the most precise feelings one has. In this case, I don't think I'll be able to get through the date if we are talking totally off subject. I will redirect the coversation somehow. First in an indirect way and then subtly make it direct. At this point, I have nothing to lose. She either has genuine interest in me or she doesn't. It's as simple as that. There is no two ways about. She either wants to take this friendship further than that's just meaningful hugs or she wants to leave it at that. Having said that, I will be very calm and contain myself during this conversation because that's only right way to do it. It's been about two weeks since I asked her be my girlfriend and she said no and wanted to know me better. But I can sense things, too. This slowly progressive shit might work when there isn't strong feelings. But when's strong feelings at stake then it becomes a totally different situation. I mean it's been almost four weeks now.

yeah man. i probably would do the same thing if i was in your situation to be honest. im impatient. like i said though my advice and trapts advice is good advice but praticing it isnt easy. i look forward to hearing about the date and what happened. i will say this: after talking to you for what about 2-3 weeks she would be lucky to have you. your a good dude. (i may be turning gay. all the gay dance party pics around here) haha

Anybody going to do anything about the spam? Or we just gonna let them chill out now.

?????? i dont understand.