Metallica - St. Anger
Elektra Entertainment Group Inc.
Midlife Crisis Metal
11 songs (75:02)
Release year: 2003
Metallica, Elektra
Reviewed by Jay
Crap of the month

Usually before a release by a major band, the reviewers discuss the album amongst ourselves and we cannot form a consensus opinion. On many occasions, an underscore has been substantially higher or lower than the reviewer’s score. This week (in one of the first times since I have been on the team), we came to a unanimous agreement. Metallica has failed us.

Before I continue with the review, I have a few points I would like to make:

  1. Metallica, Please Retire. I want to be able to see you tour each summer without too much crap accumulated in your catalogue. Load and Reload were sub par albums but they cannot compare to this.
  2. I never thought I would HATE a Metallica album before. I do not particularly care for Justice, Load and Reload but I don’t hate them. I can listen to Load and enjoy many of the songs but with St. Anger, I just hate listening to the music. It’s terrible. After listening to this album several times, I wanted to destroy my new store bought Metallica album.
  3. Jason must be laughing his ass off. He is the only one with integrity because he jumped off the sinking ship.
  4. Bob Rock? I can’t believe you put your name on this turd. For someone who charges a couple million per album, you can’t afford to ruin your reputation with this.
  5. Robert Trujillo should leave this band before he records an album with them. While touring as the bass player is one thing, putting your name (which is quite respected in metal circles) on crap like this will destroy your street cred just like Metallica.

First things first. This album wins the award right upfront for WORST DRUM SOUND EVER! A drummer for my old band couldn’t tune his drums. Each time we would press him to learn to tune them he told us “Lars Ulrich can’t tune his own drums either. He’s had the same guy doing it for 20 years!” Well, I guess Lars and this guy must have had a falling out. The snare is the most annoying thing ever. It sounds like the snare head was replaced with a Teflon coating. Or maybe it’s a steel drum? The sound is so high pitched and reverby it bores into your mind and you feel like killing yourself. The cymbals sound shallow and don’t have the huge crash that we expect and need from a Metallica album. The toms are nearly as low as the bass drum and have a dreadful fuzzy sound to them. The bass drum is so low you can’t hear exactly what Lars is doing on it. You were never the best drummer but don’t try and fool us into thinking you have finally developed skills on the pedals by using predictable and played out commercial fills on the double bass. As Jason Newstead said in an interview “But, c’mon Lars? He hasn’t practiced drums in ages. He’s let his art fall away from him.” These statements are very grounded in reality. Lars was never the best skinbeater and the bathroom recording of the drumkit just ruins it all.

Moving on to other aspects of the recording, the bass is tuned down to the lowest end of the spectrum of hearing possible. Metallica was trying to be contemporary and took a wrong turn. They took lessons from the Limp Bizkit School for Shitty Music and ruined the bass sound on this album. It’s disheartening that Fred Durst has this kind of influence. The guitars similarly sound like the tuning a stoner metal band like Fu Manchu or High on Fire would use. There is a reason that stoner metal sounds awful. The guitar sound is a far cry from the racing thrash guitar that Metallica almost single-handedly brought to the world. The worst part in all of this is that there are NO SOLOS! While Hammet does play some leads alone, there are none of those shredding, killing, solos that Metallica is famous for. How can the people who brought us “Creeping Death” do this? They know what real metal is. They know what their rabid fans want. I predicted that if this album was “Master of Puppets 2,” the world would embrace Metallica again. If this album was “Reloaded,” the world would continue calling them sellouts. This album doesn’t make you do either; it just makes you pity them for what they’ve become.

Finally and of equal importance is James. WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED? Did you forget how to sing? The vocals on this album are bar none the worst I have heard on an album this year. He just randomly screams so cacophonously many times for no reason. Half of the time, he sings completely out of key. Kirk is appalling on backing vocals. Why couldn’t James track the backing vocals too? Kirk cannot sing and he ruins the songs with his atrocious backing vocals. In addition, the lyrics took a major slide as well. Even on Load and Reload there were songs with metal lyrics like “Fuel” and “King Nothing.” The lyrics on this album could have been written by shitty garage bands like The White Stripes or (the most overrated band ever) The Strokes.

The album opens with “Frantic” which was played over the credits of the MTVicon show. This is not an album opener. “Hit the Lights,” “Battery,” “Fight Fire with Fire,” “Enter Sandman,” and hell even “Fuel” are album-opening songs. They make you excited to listen to the album. “Frantic” just rubs you wrong from the first seconds. “Frantic-tic-tic-tic-toc” has got to be the stupidest and most aggravating song lyric ever. James’ screams don’t help anything either. I don’t know what the breakdown riff is supposed to be but it’s annoying.

Next comes the title track, “St. Anger.” The video, as you have probably seen, was shot in San Quentin Prison in California. As a friend of mine said to me last night “When they said that all the families that have been affected by San Quentin will always be a part of the Metallica family, I felt like throwing the goddamned TV out the window.” Metallica is a badass thrash band, not Hallmark. They can’t afford put cheesy, plastic and most importantly, untrue emotional subtexts into everything they do. By the way, the song is no winner either. Again, the snare just kills the song before it has a chance to go anywhere. The guitar riff sounds like Korn or Slipknot and the whole double bass portion sounds like a session drummer actually played it because Lars was never that good. Kirk’s rapping is uninspired and only detracts from the song. Kirk should stick to the six-string razor. So should James for that matter. The music in the verses is virtually non-existent like many nu metal songs of today.

Some Kind of Monster” follows next. This is the first of three eight+ minute songs on the album. The problem is that these aren’t good songs. These are “staring-at-your-watch-wondering-when-it’ll-be-over” eight minute songs. There is a lead guitar intro to the song which is as close as we get to a solo. James is basically trying to rap to this music. I didn’t appreciate it at all. The growling bass during the bridges are horrid. As are James’ pathetic screams of “We the people” during the bridge as well. At one point there is this religious style chanting which probably was intended to have some sort of tribal flair to appeal to the Soulfly fans out there. The significance is completely lost.

The next crapfest is “Dirty Window.” From the song’s inception, the snare sound ruins it. This overpowers everything and casts a whole shadow over what had potential to be good. The song had lots of potential but Metallica ruined it. I like the verse part a lot. It does harken back to the old style. The rest of the song is shit but that one part had potential. However, when you layer on the sounds of the bass and guitar, the shitty drums and awful vocals, it all self-destructs.

Invisible Kid” starts out like a Soundgarden song. Interestingly enough, this too has potential. The drumming even starts to sound interesting for a while. The intro is one of the best parts of the song. The horrible choices of instrumentation tarnish the song. Then all of a sudden, there is a total nu metal riff with high-hat rolls. Just no. The breakdown is typical nu metal and James' quasi-singing, quasi-spoken word is out of tune and out of sync with his audience.

My World” has in intro similar to “Ain’t my Bitch.” It can’t sustain that goodness. The chorus has James using too many effects and sounding like some generic nu metal band. Screaming “Suck It!” doesn’t help your cause of trying to become the toughest band in metal again. The break down in the middle of the song is garbage once more. The uninspired, cookie-cutter riff could have come from anyone from The Deftones to Chevelle.

I nearly pissed my pants when I heard the opening of “Shoot Me Again.” There is direct homology between this and a song by the band Cold. The drumming sounded lifted from Disturbed and the bouncy tempo could have come from Slipknot or bands of that ilk. The verse sounds like Jonathan Davis’ whining vocals. Pure and simple this is a nu metal song. It is a travesty that Metallica is reduced to playing this music. “Shoot Me Again” is the first seven-minute nu metal song.

Before I go into the song, I have a problem with the title “Sweet Amber.” The album is called “St. Anger.” Isn’t it just smart not to title a song so close to the album and title track? The song itself isn’t that bad for this album but again it just cannot hold water on it’s own. They sound like they’re ripping off themselves during the break down. The drumming and riffing sounds lifted from “One.” Why does it have to sound so contrived? The tempo is there, where are the speedy melodic riffs and solos?

The Unnamed Feeling” they speak of is the disgust and disheartening sinking feeling that their fans are experiencing right now. This slow and plodding rocker is one of the more unified songs on the album but again feels contrived. James does turn in his best performance on this album though. It is a tiny jewel of performance until the end of the song when he just loses it all. The clean portion of the song gives you a fleeting reminder of “The Unforgiven” but just as you begin to enjoy it, it’s ripped away in favor of more nu riffs, detuned bass and guitar feedback.

Purify” as in what Metallica has to do to their music, is the next song. I don’t even know what there is to say any more. It sucks. Skip it. Next. “All Within My Hands” is the final song. Clocking in at almost nine minutes, it is the worst song on the album. The very beginning sounds almost identical to “Shoot Me Again.” The constant snare beating again makes you sick of this music fast. James sounds like Corey Taylor (Slipknot, Stone Sour) on this song. It’s so fucking sad to listen to this knowing Metallica’s back catalogue. Near the end of the song, there is a part where James is yelling “Kill, kill, kill…” over and over. It’s the worst thing I’ve ever heard put to tape.

This band is a shell of their former selves. I’m so ashamed that they would stoop this low just to be popular. Jason’s departure was justified after hearing this. The reason I called this Midlife Crisis metal is that we all know that at least James and Kirk (a.k.a. Carlos Santana. Have you seen what he looks like lately?) don’t want to be playing this vile baseness. The one point in my quote is a nod to their catalogue. Metallica were once the baddest thrashers on the planet. Now they are merely a sad and disheartening bad joke.

Killing Songs :
For Whom the Bell Tolls, Battery, Damage Inc. etc…
Jay quoted 1 / 100
Danny quoted 55 / 100
Mike quoted 10 / 100
Jeff quoted 35 / 100
Marty quoted 60 / 100
Crims quoted 45 / 100
Ben quoted 0 / 100
Aleksie quoted 62 / 100
Other albums by Metallica that we have reviewed:
Metallica - 72 Seasons reviewed by Goat and quoted 35 / 100
Metallica - S&M2 reviewed by Goat and quoted no quote
Metallica - Hardwired... To Self-Destruct reviewed by Goat and quoted 80 / 100
Metallica - Ride the Lightning reviewed by Adam and quoted CLASSIC
Metallica - Reload reviewed by Aleksie and quoted 62 / 100
To see all 17 reviews click here
107 readers voted
Average:
 16
Your quote was: 0.
Change your vote

There are no replies yet to this review
Be the first one to post a reply!