Thunder Rider - Tales of Darkness and Light Chapter II
Thunder Rider Productions
Laughable Fantasy Metal
15 songs (65:53)
Release year: 2004
Thunder Rider
Reviewed by Jay
Crap of the month

This is the second chapter in the epic saga that Thunder Rider wants to tell. It is to be noted that chapter I was released eight years ago. This Canadian band is led and masterminded by a strange individual called John Blackwing. Enough with the background, this album is an embarrassment to all things metal. Why can't people listen to their own music slightly critically and realize that it is better off languishing in their basement than being unleashed upon the world. Such is the case with this album. There is no conceivable reason for this to be brought forth into the world.

John Blackwing writes the music and sings as well. His voice sounds like Bon Scott gargling with the worlds cheapest delay effects. Any attempt to call this nonsense skillfully crafted metal vocals would be like calling the Eurovision song contest a showcase for good metal. I've sung better than this in the shower. The guitar is boring and plays the same riffs repeatedly for the entire album. The drumming is monotonous, basic and uninteresting. The keyboards are the $8.99 Casio keyboards everyone had in the 80's. Please.

Bury this one and never look back. If you want to see how metal is not done check out this one and its song titles like "Heavy Metal Wizzard,"(sic) "Lucky Devil," "Satan's Wrath" and the like. The bonus track at the end is the worst of all and you really have to hate your fans to give them such a turd as a bonus. No originality, no talent, this one's got nothing. At least St. Anger was funny.

Killing Songs :
Trying to erase this from my mind.
Jay quoted 25 / 100
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