Metal Reviews

Accidentally found this while doing a websearch. Thought I'd share it with you. These are the WORST (not "best") riffs/solos/etc:

100. Michael Jackson-Black or white
99.The Replacements-Hootenanny
98.Godsmack-Running Blind
97.Disturbed-Down with the Sickness
96.Rosie & the Originals-Give Me Love
95.Spin Doctors-2 Princes
94.Eric Clapton-I've Got a Rock and Roll Heart
93.The Allman Brothers Band-High Falls
92.Ministry-Filth Pig
91.INXS- Need You Tonight
90-Styx-Mr. Roboto
89-White Stripes-Offend in Every Way
88-Dead Boys-Sonic Reducer
87-Autograph-Turn Up the Radio
86-The Beatles-If You've Got Troubles
85-Blue Traveler-Closing Down the Park
84-Pantera-Ride My Rocket
83-Joe Satriani-Cryin'
82-The Replacements-Black Diamond
81-Nazareth-Hair of the Dog
80-The Cure-Pictures of You
79-Whitesnake-Spit It Out
78-The Strokes-Last Night
77-The Firm-Radioactive
76-Kiss-Firehouse
75-Joan Jett and the Blackhearts-I love Rock and Roll
74-Grateful Dead-Not Fade Away
73-Dinosaur Jr.-Show Me the Way
72-Bob Dylan-Quinn the Eskimo(the Mighty Quinn)
71-Sammy Hagar-3 Lock Box
70-The Kinks- Welcome to Sleazytown
69-The Ramones-This Ain't Havana
68-Tyrannosaurus Rex-Elemental Child
67-The Rolling Stones-Sympathy for the Devil
66-Billy Joel-It's Still Rock and Roll to Me
65-Slayer-Exile
64-Neil Young & Crazy Horse-Rapid Transit
63-Loverboy-Working for the Weekend
62-Stevie Ray Vaughn-Say What!
61-Living Colour-Cult of Personality
60-Slipknot-Spit it Out
59-The Cult-Born to be Wild
58-Journey-Faithfully
57-The Cramps-Garbage Man
56-Aerosmith-Walk this Way(Live Bootleg)
55-Triumph-Lay It On the Line
54-Bruce Springsteen-Badlands
53-Lou Reed-the ENTIRE Metal Machine Music ALBUM
52-Jefferson Starship-Be My Lady
51-Nitro-Freight Train
50-Albert King-Don't Let Me Be Lonely Tonight
49-Godsmack-Moon Baby
48-P.O.D.-Eternal
47-Marilyn Manson-Cyclops
46-Candlebox-Far Behind
45-Jimi Hendrix-Foxey Lady
44-Offspring-Lightning Rod
43-Venom- At War with Satan
42-The Who-Eminence Front
41-Motley Crue-Looks that Kill
40-Limp Bizkit-Faith
39-Bob Marley & the Wailers-Stir It Up
38-Jackyl-She Loves My Cock
37-AC/DC-Dirty Deeds Done Dirty Cheap
36-Molly Hatchett-Gator Country
35-Rage Against the Machine-Know Your Enemy
34-David Lee Roth-Yankee Rose
33-Kiss-Love Gun
32-Thin Lizzy-The Rocker
31-The Grateful Dead-Shakedown Street
30-BB KIng-Into the Night
29-Iron Maiden-Fear is the Key
28-Green Day-Brain Stew
27-Poison-Every Rose Has It's Thorn
26-Faith No More- Epic
25-Warrant-Cherry Pie
24-Vinnie Vincent Invasion-Boyz Are Gonna Rock
23-Smashing Pumpkins-Zero
22-Blind Melon-No Rain
21-Buzzcocks-Noise Annoys
20-METALLICA-2x4
19-Roy Buchanan-Sneaking Godzilla Through the Alley
18-Britny Fox-Save the Weak
17-Def Leppard-Rocket
16-David Bowie-Hang Onto Yourself
15-Korn-Y'all Want a Single
14-Peter Frampton- Do You Feel Like We Feel
13-Kenny Loggins-Danger Zone
12-Twisted Sister- We're Not Gonna Take It
11-Megadeth-Crush 'Em

AND NOW THE TOP 10........

10-Lenny Kravitz-American Woman
9-Manowar-Sting of the Bumblebee
8-The Rolling Stones-Ain't Too Proud to Beg
7-Ted Nugent-Wango Tango
6-Black Flag-Thirsty and Miserable
5-The Beatles-All You Need is Love
4-Cream-Falstaff beer 1967 radio spot
3-Carlos Santana- The Game of Love
2-Blue Cheer-Summertime Blues
1-Poison-Guitar Solo(Swallow This......Live)

All You Need Is Love I totally agree with. I fucking hate that chorus (repeating the title about three times with a riff in between that sounds more like it should be played when a comedian makes a bad joke than in a supposed love song).

On the flipside, I totally disagree with the Billy Joel song. That opening drum beat is probably one of my favorite bits of any rock song.

It was posted before. Anyways, I think the main riff from Black Metal Ist Krieg by Nargaroth is the worst riff ever.

Most of these I haven't heard, but a lot of selections in there I really have to agree with, such as that awful piece of shit "I Love Rock 'n' Roll" or MJ's "Black or White". A lot of selections are kinda pointless though, like Autograph's "Turn Up the Radio", Spin Doctors' "Two Princes" and DLR's "Yankee Rose", because these aren't really based on their respective main riffs anyway (the DLR song barely even HAS a discernable theme riff). Now as for another couple of selections, however:



GODDAMMIT! :evil: That riff is just totally genius, but oh well look at my username...



That riff is so utterly fucking classic and everyone knows it, but I dunno maybe it sounds butchered on that live version or something?

Wow, I'm glad that I haven't heard 97 of these. Yup, exactly 97.

:shock: Damn I would've guessed anyone would've heard at least 90 of those at some point in their life...how about listing them? I mean not the 97 you've heard but more conveniently the three you HAVE heard. Not being elitist (I'm just 19 dammit!) or anything, I'm just curious.

Consider yourself lucky for the most part then, most of this stuff is utter crap anyway.

Question: How can Lenny Kravitz get credit for American woman when he didnt even come up with the riff?

These guys really seem to hate simple riffs.. I mean Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap? An elitist list if I ever saw one.

Rage Against The Machine - Know Your Enemy is an awesome song. Fuck them.

Fuck RatM, rather. No point in defending them.

I personally would have put Leper Messiah on that list. Without a doubt, one of the most annoying main riffs ever written (and possibly the worst pre-Black Album Metallica song).

Hmmm...I like that song.

I've heard 35,60,65. So what ? I'm 20.

WTF No way da man can never have a bad riff :twisted:

Ditto. AND they criticize Dylan and the Stones. Nuke 'em, I say.

I dont understand the point of having a top 100 worst ever guitar solos, riffs, etc. If they are the worst, then they wouldnt be memorable and no one would care.
And i agree about Jimi, Foxy Lady is an awesome song, nothing wrong with those riffs. Same with Warrant's Cherry Pie.

poison-guitar solo


i gotta listen to that

Yeah I always thought the riff in that song was great..

Yeah a brilliant headbanging riff. RATM are one of the few bands I like that I can actually dance to.

And Sting of the Bumblebee rocks, DeMaio's only listenable bass solo as far as I'm concerned.

In the GW article, they diss the solo.

Yeah I forgot about that, that's it's actually not just riffs on that list, which would explain the strange inclusion of Aerosmith's "Walk This Way".