Do you find anything negative or bad with fat and ugly, beer-suckling, party-loving Germans with hair down to their asses and a band name picked by seeing a word being defined as a “beer mug” in the dictionary, singing about what can roughly be described or flagged as inappropriate? Yeah, me neither! Butt-licking, beer-chugging and new livers aside, this is Tankard’s tenth full-length in twenty years. B-Day you ask. Yeah, their 20th anniversary that is, and what’s better to celebrate with than yet another album chock-full of drunken thrash metal? You know what to expect here, and if you’re a Tankard-fan, there’s nothing that will indicate that you shouldn’t like B-Day, as this is more of the consistent, top shelf German thrashing madness these guys are used to deliver.

Notorious Scum kicks off the party with the usual Tankard party-recipe. Blasting drums, fast and aggressive riffs, lyrics going basically nowhere, which is all topped by Guerre’s increasingly intense vocal work. If you are able to get past the tragedy/comedy of the lyrics, which some people for some reason seem to struggle with, this band will appear to you as one of the best thrash acts out there, and you’ll get to bask in its ethanolic glory. With their down-to-earth and charismatic view and hysterically humorous approach, they are more than easier to get than all the other thrash metal bands lost in their own religion-bashing world where none other than themselves are taking them seriously. Rectifier continues the thrash-fest with fast chopping riffs, pounding and exciting drums as well as an attitude you will have to search a long time for to experience. Musically, this is rather flawless, as Gutjahr churns out riff after riff with intense speed without ever looking back. 20 years of madness, and they aren’t showing any signs of slowing down at all, as they deliver face-fisting songs that’ll leave your beat-up conscience to black out in a puddle of booze and blood. The outstanding rhythmic work by the mountainous backbone that consists of Olaf Zissel and Frank Thorwarth, drummer and bassist respectively, should not go unnoticed either. They have no problems whatsoever with following the frantic riffing and furious melodies put on display, and succeeds in backing them up with a rock solid foundation without any cracks or flaws. There is no point in going into every song in detail, as this is more of the same. Nothing has changed from before, and nothing changed after this either. However, the fact that these guys manage to keep it sprawling with every release, not losing their reputation even though they’re not developing in any particular direction with every release. They do what they do best, and they deliver as they always have and always will do unlike tons of other bands.

Tankard can easily be hailed as one of the few thrash bands that has managed to both keep the old-school feeling as well as getting properly modernized. Instead of exploring new directions that involves jumping on a wave of whatever, they keep their thrash alive and kicking, or in their own words, Ugly Fat, and Still Alive. With skull-crushing riffs-attacks, powerful and frenetic melodies with the desired amount of hooks, and an as flawless as ever vocal performance by Guerre, this is yet another intoxicating trip through the drunken minds of these entertaining Germans. No experimenting with electronic elements, no bullshit breakdowns, not even a ballad, just pure thrashing madness from beginning to end. Cheers for the twenty years, and here’s to twenty more. EMPTY THE FUCKING TANKARD!